Wendy Valentine welcomes AnnE Marie Chaker to Midlife Makeover Show

Wendy Valentine: Welcome back to the Midlife Makeover Show. I’m your host, Wendy Valentine. And today’s guest is going to flip the script on how we think about our bodies, our strength, and the stories we’ve been told for generations. Ann Marie Chakar is a veteran journalist who spent over two decades reporting for the Wall Street Journal, covering everything from politics to cultural trends to breaking news annual including the events of 9 11. But in midlife, Anne Marie took on a new beat, her own body. She became a professional bodybuilder and wrote the viral article, I never thought I’d write this. I am a female bodybuilder, which has been viewed over 500,000 times. Oh, my gosh. You go, girl. In her new book, Lift with the most amazing, gorgeous cover, Anne Marie dives deep into how the modern obsession with thinness has limited women physically, emotionally, and even politically. But here’s the twist. By building strength, women can break free from body image insecurities and reclaim true power. We’re going to talk about her journey, the history behind diet culture, and how every woman in midlife can redefine what it means to be strong. Please welcome Ann Marie to the show.

Y’ all. It was fun. I felt like I was getting a little window into your life

Anne Marie Chaker: Y’ all.

Wendy Valentine: We’ve been talking for probably 30 minutes before we started.

Anne Marie Chaker: No.

Wendy Valentine: Are we supposed to do that?

Anne Marie Chaker: I felt like we could keep going. It was fun. So I love your life. I felt like I was getting a little window into your. Your life there and.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, I know my wild life. You know, you gotta get wild.

How did you go from being a journalist to being a bodybuilder

so first question for you. How did you go from being a journalist to being a bodybuilder? What inspired you?

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, so it was, like many things, it was a story kind of born of struggle. I was in a very unhealthy way, at some point, in my life where the shit really hit the fan, as it does for many of us. At some point, I had just had my second baby and was really struggling with, postpartum stuff, depression. and then a couple weeks of that, I was nursing my baby on the couch and a neighbor came over to tell me my dad suddenly had a heart attack while walking the dog. I mean, I’d just spoken to my dad about, like, a grocery run. So that was, hugely, devastating, finding dad. my folks lived a couple doors down. and then my marriage disintegrated. So it was like boom, boom, boom, within weeks of each other. You know, my dad was gone, my husband had left, and I had this baby and wasn’t doing so hot. I think I counted something like 11 days of not being able to sleep. Which I know sounds completely insane, but it’s a sign of deep depression when you just like, cannot sleep. Right? So, a neighbor of mine, a friend, came over and we were kind of cross legged on the couch and I was crying and she said, just have a glass of wine to help you sleep. Sleep. This is insane. So that’s where it started. I started. I was never much of a drinker before, but, had half a glass of wine to take the edge off and then it became more. And then that became more in a bottle in there. And this went on for years. I just couldn’t stop. I was really, quite literally addicted to the stuff. And, all this came to a head one day I was taking, my daughters to an ice hockey tournament. They played ice hockey at the time. And we were staying at a dink hotel, where the tournament was. And there was a woman, a hockey mom in the, in the fitness room of this dinky, hotel who was, just looked incredible. She was a mom of like a kid on my team and I was coaching at the time. And her muscles were popping. She was, beautiful, but not because she was thin, but because she was really fit and she really knew what she was doing. Like, she was like logging things in and she had packed a band with her. I’d never seen anyone do that. And the way she was lifting weights. So I was looking at her and I was just like, shit, give me some of that. so I went up to her and I kind of said, you know, what’s your deal? Like, what are you, a crossfitter? What? I said, you look amazing. I look terrible. I think I have a drinking problem. so she said, no, no, I do bodybuilding and, blah, blah, blah. She was talking about like her workouts and she tracks macronutrients and the nutrition is a big part of it and has a coach. And I thought, my God, she’s like intense. But I kind of loved that. Like, I loved the. So she put me in touch with her coach and said, she’ll work with you. Like, you don’t have to be a bodybuilder. She’ll work with you on like, fitness and nutrition. And so was a retired bodybuilder, this coach. So I got home and I reached out to this lady and that’s where my fitness journey started.

Wendy Valentine: A very healthy journey.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, you know, what was interesting was, yeah, it started with, nutrition. Like, you know, it didn’t Start with, like, go to the gym and like, like, do all these dead. It really. The coach just kind of looked at what it was I was eating every day. And we quickly found, just from tracking, that I was basically going from coffee in the morning to mindlessly, you know, whatever scraps came off my toddler’s plates at the time to wine and. Which was not exactly the breakfast of champions, right M. So she was like, you’re not eating nearly enough. And that blew my mind because we’ve been taught our whole lives to, like, that we’re always eating too much and to, like, cut your portion sizes and to, like, you know, diet and the number on the scale. So the idea that, like, wow, I should be eating more kind of rocked my world and protein. And she talked to me about macronutrients. So we started tracking the macronutrients and focus attention on protein. And, I was eating really well. I was focusing on whole foods. And, my craving of alcohol sort of naturally waned. Just what do you think?

Wendy Valentine: Do you think that was more because of the foods? Was it a mental thing?

Anne Marie Chaker: I don’t know. I think it might have been a combination of things. I think, that. And, you know, she was sending me to the gym also, not for cardio. Which was another thing I’d always associated with the gym is like, you go there to burn calories and, like, run on the treadmill or whatever. But she was a. Assigning. She was assigning weightlifting exercises to me. So it was this combination of, you know, eating really well and getting my spilkes out in the gym through weightlifting that just kind of made me feel really good. And, And I just didn’t have this craving. I think maybe sometimes, I don’t know if, like, we reach for wine or alcohol, not thinking that we’re consuming any. Like, it’s okay because we’re just. But it’s actually like. It’s stuff that does something to your body and it’s. It is a toxin. And like, you know, we kind of mindlessly reach for it, but, you know, not.

Fitness is addictive, and if you lean on it too much, you’re unhealthy

There’s not. There’s anything wrong with that sometimes. But, like, you know, it is addictive. And if you’re leaning on it too much, you’re probably maybe not making the best food choices. so maybe that was some of what was happening. I think the other thing was happening was just like, I had always been an athlete in college, and then that aspect of my life was gone. and like, the traditional, fitness classes never really appealed to me. Like, I’m not a yoga person. I’m not, like, a jogger mommy person. Like, so there was nowhere for my, you know, stuff to go.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, you. You couldn’t get the energy out, which you need to.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, you need to.

What did you notice after starting weightlifting

Anne Marie Chaker: So what.

Wendy Valentine: What did you notice after, like, maybe even if you can remember, you know, a few weeks after you were into it, like, what did you notice mentally and physically, spiritually, emotionally?

Anne Marie Chaker: my confidence soared. and what I mean by that is I just, like, I started kicking ass at work. Like, I, you know, would go for a lift, I would come back to my desk, I would have, like, amazing new ideas, and. But more than that, like, I was more productive. I kind of pushed back. Like, I was just, like, felt comfortable saying no. and, I heard it in my voice, too. Like, I would get on the call, on interviews, like, interviewing people, and I could feel, like, a sort of athletic confidence in my voice. And it was kind of like. The feeling was like a homecoming to, like, the athlete I’d once been and kind of lost and just kind of feel like we’re inherent athletes, right? And it’s important for women to feel that way. It gives us confidence. We have strength. And that’s what I’m hoping that the book shows is that, like, this is something innate in us. we are badass, muscular creatures by history and by nature. And, just the weightlifting and the athleticism and the nutri. All of it, like, kind of rekindled all of that for me. And so, like, the journalist in me wanted to dig in and find out, like, more like, why didn’t I. Why wasn’t I getting this before? And what’s the story behind that?

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, well, exactly. Like, why is society not telling us? Like, hey, you get. You should be stronger. You should have better care of your body. Right? Not just for the reasons. Right. So I actually. Oh, do you have your book in with you?

Anne Marie Chaker: Why? Yes, I do.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah. Please. Look at that thing. It is so pretty.

Anne Marie Chaker: I.

Wendy Valentine: Okay. Is that your arm?

Anne Marie Chaker: So everybody’s gonna ask me this. M. It is not my arm. This is not my arm. But I will say my art. So I had this thing with the publisher. I was like, okay, can we put my arm. Because my arm is just as jacked as this. But this. But everybody’s gonna ask me, like, is that your arm? And I want to be able to say yes. And they were like, well, it wouldn’t be too complicated exchange. Just say, I had a picture. I know. Maybe I should just Be like, yeah, it’s my fucking arm.

Wendy Valentine: That’s my arm. And you should see my legs.

Anne Marie Chaker: I even had a photographer to kind of fight for this. I had a photographer take a picture of me on my arm and I was like, use this one.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah. It’s a great, great cover. I love it.

Anne Marie Chaker: Thanks. I like it too. I really like the color. This pink. It’s so. It’s like an ironic. I. I just love this color.

Wendy Valentine: I, saw you had on your Instagram, I think you had found a fingernail polish.

Anne Marie Chaker: The nail polish. Yes.

Wendy Valentine: And I was like, it is. It’s kind of like a. I don’t know. What, What?

Anne Marie Chaker: Like a kind of orchid. I think the nail polish color was like, orchid or something. But it’s like. It’s an ironic. It’s like, let’s go with pink. But it’s like kind of an edgy, ironic pink.

Wendy Valentine: Pink. You know what I love about it? Because it’s combining. It’s a good blend of masculine and feminine energy.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah. Oh, my God, I love that. You nailed that. Yeah. I love, like, the orange and the pink, like, and then blues and then. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The focus on thinness actually came in the latter part of the 1800s

Wendy Valentine: So. And I did already start reading the book. It is so good. And today is pub date for you, which I know as an author is a big day, so, Yes, it is. Ready?

Anne Marie Chaker: A Hallmark card for that or something. Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: Right.

Anne Marie Chaker: Happy pup day.

Wendy Valentine: So. Yes. so what I would like to do, the book is divided up into three parts. And it’s so brilliant the way you have it. So pool. Part one is pool. Pulling Back the Curtain on the Story of Women’s Bodies. Chapter one is the Story of Skinny. How we got the idea we were supposed to be thin. Dive into that a little bit. That’s interesting. The history of us and.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, so, you know, I was telling you about, like, my. You know, I’m this sample size one. And yet, like, what’s going on here? Like, transformed into this different person with this weightlifting and this, you know, focus on more. More and better food and, And like, basically the. The best way I can describe the feeling is that, like, I had come home into this body that I felt like I was always meant to inhabit. And, like, that I performed best at. So, I kind of researched, like, what does history say about, like, the way we were once built? And I became really enamored of this study out of Cambridge, from just a couple years ago. this woman, this, anthropologist had bothered to. Nobody had ever done this. People always compared early women’s Bones to early men’s bones. But she. Yeah, just because, like, you know, and then they really focused on the men’s bones because they kind of showed an interesting trajectory over time of like, okay, well, here’s when men started using tools more and their bodies became less muscular. Muscular. And they relied more on different tools and as technology. So, you know, and the women’s bodies tended to not change as much. So the focus was always. But this woman was really wanted to learn more about these early women’s bones structure. So she compared them to, women’s bone structure at Cambridge. The modern students that were there. A population mixed of, you know, students, athletes, more sedentary girls and so forth. And she found the early women, Women’s bones were the size of Olympic rowers today. Like elite rowers today, like modern elite rowers. Meaning, like, these early women were buff badasses. And this not notion that they were out picking berries in the field while the men hunted was totally myth. Like a myth. It was not true. These women were hauling, they were lifting heavy things. They were obviously an integral part of agriculture. Hear me right? Yeah. Dog is long.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah.

Anne Marie Chaker: Okay.

Wendy Valentine: Oh, no, no, I can’t hear.

Anne Marie Chaker: Okay, okay.

Anne Marie Chaker: They were obviously an integral part of agriculture. So I, So then I started exploring. Well, there’s like a whole history of, you know, skinny. Like, so what was the deal with that? Like, so, right. The. The focus on thinness actually came in the latter part of the 1800s. So it’s a fairly recent phenomenon. All this through these. These early millennia. Like, we were always these buff, strong badasses. And so it’s only 1860s, 1880s, when food became more plentiful. and it’s, you know, thin started to become seen more as a status symbol. You start, start hearing more about corpulence. Corpulence being something that was maybe not seen very well. And then, you know, food restriction kind of came about, as like a moral virtue. So there were all of these things, threads that were, you know, over the decades, kind of feeding into this, you know, skinny is good thin, let’s be thin culture. So that’s a fairly. And the other thing that I found, which was really interesting is these waves of skinny kind of came about in. At moments where women started to get more power. So that perhaps it’s not coincidence that, the flappers came about when women got the vote. and then when, there was that sort of second wave of feminism and Equal Rights Amendment and all of that in the 60s and 70s, you had Twiggy, and that. So, you know, then when. In the 80s, when, you know, women started infiltrating the boardroom and, like, you know, became, you know, working girl in the big shoulder, then you had, like, the waifs. So it’s almost like there could be an argument that there was this, like, cultural movement to kind of keep women in their more childlike, state, less powerful state at moments when, we seem to be grabbing for more power. So. Interesting. I became very interested in that.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, that is, yeah, definitely in the 80s. I mean, that was like the diet, decade when all those crazy bits were coming out. Right. And women were. Starting today.

Women in midlife are looking at menopause as a new opportunity

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah. You know, this is coming at a moment where we.

Wendy Valentine: So in other words, it’s like, what is. What is that message then that we’re receiving? If you want to be more powerful and if you really want to stand in your truth and if you want. You want to be a woman, you’re going to go do all these badass things. You need to be smaller.

Anne Marie Chaker: It’s almost like society, like a patriarchal society kind of telling us to pushing us back into our, place. Right? Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: Like, we really don’t want.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anne Marie Chaker: I, think, we are in this moment now where, forces that are shaping us have changed. And I think now you’re hearing, I think, in a really powerful way, like, people in midlife, women in midlife are, you know, really looking at menopause, as a new opportunity. Right. Like, yeah, well, wait. We don’t have enough, you know, doctors telling us to. How to take care of ourselves and, like, you know, helping us with these symptoms and, like, wait, we should actually be lifting weight, weights. It’s not good for us to know, look frail at 50 and say, actually, you know, it’s not good. Like, osteopenia is not a good thing, and osteoporosis is. This is what it is. And we should be like, we’re in this moment where, like, women are kind of saying, what the fuck? Like, we. This, you know, this whole skinny thing hasn’t served us well.

Wendy Valentine: And it’s exhausting. It’s, you know, exhausting around for decades. Just hungry.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: Hungry. And I learned that too about, like, you. You actually can eat more. And it. This whole thing of, like, eating less is good. No, no. Like, you need. Your, body is. Your body’s craving more.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah. And there’s, like, the. It’s not our fault. Right. Because the messages are everywhere. From the moment we’re Born. It’s like thin is at the grocery. Everything is a thin, you know, and like the jeans are skinny. And it’s just like these messages of skin and thin or permeate our entire culture. So of course we’re like all screwed up about it because it’s what we’ve been fed from day day one. no pun intended.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, right. Yeah.

Anne Marie Chaker: and there’s a never enoughness about it too. Right? Like that was like my whole struggle, my whole life. It was just like I wanted to be good. I wanted to like meet this like idea of perfection. And yet like I could never quite. Like, I was never skinny. Like I could never quite get there. I was always athletic. I like to eat and like I could never. So there is just like this drumbeat of I don’t know, disappointment and self loathing and, and so when I just, I discovered strength, it was just like a drink of water and I really wanted to get under like the why and the how. And I really wrote the book to help women understand that like they have this in them. And this is how I did it. And this is how you can do it too.

Wendy Valentine: I know. It’s so good. I love it, I love it, I love it. Let’s see. Part two. Building Push.

Anne Marie Chaker: Push.

Wendy Valentine: Get it. The first one was pull. Second one is push. Building a longer life and empowering a new generation.

Strength training for a longer life. How does it help with uh, with strength training

Chapter four. Aging beast. Strength training for a longer life. So aging beast fully. I love that.

Anne Marie Chaker: there’s always this, this guy at the gym, and it’s a young guy and I’ll admit I grunt when I, you know, put something down or lift something up. I make noises and he always kind of gives me a fist bump and he’s this beast. And I just kind of love like he’s young enough to be my son. And I love that he could tell, he felt like he could tell me I was a beast. So I don’t know, I, I guess part two. So part one is kind of like where this came from. And then part two is just like the why, and the how. Like this is how you can build a strength training approach and kind of be a beast. And it’s okay to be a beast. It’s say it’s something that like we’ve been kind of engineered to not be, always taught to be polite and to be good and be quiet and to live. But it’s okay to sweat and grunt and like crash the bar and fist bump the guy at the gym. And so, and it doesn’t have to be complicated. That’s the thing. Like we get slammed with so much marketing and bullshit and you know, you have to balance on this ball with. It’s really, you know, there’s maybe a couple things, three, four things that you can do. you can do it at home, you can do it at the gym if you like. Going to a gym, you don’t need a lot, but you just need to start lifting some weights. And you know that chapter explains how to, how to set it set up your week and what to what you can kind of coupled together in a given week.

Wendy Valentine: How does it help with with strength training? How does it help with aging? Whether that be like your bones or your muscles.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah. So, strength training is kind of like the ultimate protector of bone. It cushions the bone. you know, women lose, are susceptible to bone loss as they age as you know. So, so ah, by building more muscle we help build more bone, matter. so it not only helps build the bone matter, but it also helps protect the bone against damage and breakage. So it’s this beautiful kind of two pronged thing. So that’s why women are being told to strength train like never before because it prevents osteoporosis and osteopenia and it also like protects against falls.

Wendy Valentine: I noticed a huge difference. I started strength training probably what, a couple years ago and I have a amazing trainer here on the island. And I have four, three to four herniated discs in my spine.

Anne Marie Chaker: Wow.

Wendy Valentine: I know. And they’re so sensitive to where like if I’m loading the dishwasher it’d be like, you know, like I’m done. But since I started strength training, I have not had a disc pop out ever since. And I totally believe it’s. My back is stronger, my neck is stronger. and I just, yeah, I mean I just feel. But I say. And my posture is better because of strength training. And I would have to say too, I lose weight like, and that’s the thing. If you need to lose weight, you can lose weight with strength training. We don’t think that we can because we have been trained to like, you must run, you know, for 45 minutes on the treadmill. Actually with strength training you’re burning calories. You’re. Because and especially like leg day, you know, like, you know, leg day, like that’s the day like if you think about it, your legs, your, your booty, that’s a, that’s a lot of muscle going on there.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: And when you’re. Yeah, when you’re working those muscles, you’re burning fat.

Anne Marie Chaker: So.

Wendy Valentine: And sometimes it’s like two days later, I’m still. I can feel it. I can still feel like it’s burning and it’s like. So such a nice, nice feeling.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah. There’s. One of my favorite quotes in the book was from a doctor, at Mayo Clinic, who said something like, you’re building, like, a better metabolic engine for your body, and it’s like having a V8 engine versus like a V4 or whatever. yeah, so, yeah, you’re building a better metabolic engine. And then also there’s a ton of really interesting research about, like, the, you know, the. The mental health effects of, lifting weights. One of my favorites that just made me stop and think was the study that, showed the effects on memory and how, this researcher compared, people who did only strength training, people who did a combination of strength and cardio, and then people who did, nothing at all, or just people who did cardio only and then people who did nothing at all. And then, they showed this population cards and then asked them to remember the images on the cards. It was the population who did strength training only M. That had the best memory of what was on those cards than those that did strength and cardio and even just cardio. So I thought that was really interesting. Yeah, all this, like, you know, and I even feel it. I don’t know about you, but, like, I feel like I’ll look at myself in the gym mirror and my first set, and I’ll look at myself, be like, oh, you know, and then I’ll do like a set of something, and like, I’ll look at myself like, you know, not bad. Like, and it’s not because I’ve changed in, like the 30 seconds, but it’s because, like, there’s something in you that just kind of. Your endorphins are up, you’re feeling good, you know, your confidence source. It’s always amazing to me. And when I go home after a good workout, I feel like a brand new person. It’s just like, you can’t bottle the stuff. It’s just.

Wendy Valentine: I know. It feels so good.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, it feels really good.

Wendy Valentine: What you were saying earlier, it’s like, when you make your muscles stronger, your body stronger, you making yourself mentally stronger and emotionally stronger to like, you were saying where you kind of felt like, okay, you could stand up and speak up for yourself, a little bit better. Yeah, it’s it’s really, really fascinating.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, yeah.

Wendy Valentine: I was just gonna make one other point. I freaking forgot what the heck it was. Well, you can tell I’m not in the strength, the memory.

Anne Marie Chaker: I do this.

Wendy Valentine: I was thinking, I was thinking like I not only work out for my 52 year old self, I work out for my 92 year old self.

Anne Marie Chaker: I always, I love that of the.

Wendy Valentine: Wendy when she’s in her 90s and I want her to be like thank you so much for taking care of me, for eating well, going to the gym, sweating, whatever you had to. Like I want her to be thanking me one day for everything that I’ve done for her so that she can take a walk in the park. She can. And here in Madera like the hills are like, it’s like basically like a triangle.

What you do today is going to affect you tomorrow

Anne Marie Chaker: Oh wow.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah. I mean I, I want her to be able to do all those things and play with the grandkids and to still travel in her 90s. So I encourage everyone listening, think about your 80 year old self, your 90 year old self and think about you’re taking care of her today.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: like what you do today is going to affect you tomorrow.

Anne Marie Chaker: No, totally.

Women live much longer than men, according to research

Longevity is like a non other big. I mean there’s so much interest right now in longevity. And here’s another thing that my book takes apart is another reason like women are so much more badass than we give ourselves credit for is that in a lot of ways we are stronger than men. we live longer than men. I mean with all of the attention on like the bro y culture of like you know, exchanging blood with our sons and like, like actually for, for as long as records have been kept, women live much longer than men. And like three quarters of the centenarians that have been recorded and it’s are women. So that was one. And then like there are studies on fatigue. It’s like yeah, on average a man might be able to like lift a heavier thing but women, there’s all these like studies that show that women can outlast men in terms of like their ability to hold positions or stamina. Stamina, What was the other thing? Like our muscular makeup is one like men’s must. Men have more type 2, muscle fibers where quick, you know, quick reaction type musculature. Whereas we have like more fatigue resistant muscularity. So there’s all this fascinating research about how women are really not the weaker sex at all and that you know, the book makes an argument that we should really like be capitalizing on that.

Wendy Valentine: Yes. Yeah, that’s, that’s fascinating.

Anne Marie Chaker: Oh yeah, can’t wait to read the rest.

Chapter five is the mental game. Don’t overthink and find your why

Wendy Valentine: okay. Part three is lift Taking our bodies back. Chapter five is the mental game. Don’t overthink and find your why.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, yeah, find your why. And your why is like, it’s something that can change, you know, all the time. you know, I like, I’m proud of like my bodybuilding and I’m competing right now and bodybuilding is a big part of what I do. it’s part of my identity. but I’m also like, you know, there will be a time where maybe I don’t do that anymore. And I still plan on strength training, but maybe my why will be like your why. Like, you know, I’m doing this to like live a long life and be able to see my grandchildren and play with them and like, you know, be able to travel and do all the things like when I’m in, when I’m in my 70s and 80s, I don’t want to lose those decades. so yeah, being in touch with your why. And I would know that, right?

Wendy Valentine: Even back, back then, you’re, I’m guessing. But maybe your why was just to give you some, some sense of purpose. Getting out of the, and overcoming the addiction. And sometimes like that’s the best thing.

Anne Marie Chaker: I had lost myself. I really felt like I had lost myself. I looked in the mirror and I was just like, I could see it in my face. Like I didn’t look happy. I looked. It wasn’t because I was, I was not really overweight per se, but I just looked like out of shape and unhappy and just you could see the loss. And I just felt like I needed to reconnect with that like kick ass girl of my youth. Like, where was she? And you know, exercise really did that for me.

Wendy Valentine: Bring back your, your super she, Ro.

Anne Marie Chaker: As I, as I. Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: let’s see. Oh, Chapter six. Building your routine. A guide to beasting out. that’s what I love. So I’m guessing then you provide a routine in there with weight.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, yeah. And really kind of like ease people in. So like, you know, just to start, like ask yourself, are you a gym person? Because not everybody is into like going to a gym and that’s okay. I kind of like both. So you know, having a few things at home and here’s what you need at home to kind of set up a regular practice and you don’t need much like I would say A couple pairs of dumbbells. A band is good and they’re like, totally cheapo. You can get five dollar ban off Amazon. like a bench that you can adjust the incline is really good to have. And I see that you have a pretty decent setup and that doesn’t take up a lot of room. If you want, and you want to build, then, like, yeah, later, a barbell, like an Olympic barbell and a squat rack. But you don’t need that to start. and then, you know, gyms are great if you want to sign up for gym. Nice thing about the gym, they have more stuff, there’s more space, there’s other people there. So if you’re, you know, if you like, you know that social, like I actually kind of like, you know, getting out of the house and like seeing new people and being able to.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, it motivates you too. You see other people, like, exactly.

Anne Marie Chaker: They’re playing their music and that’s good. Yeah, yeah. but then also, like, it’s good to have stuff at home too, on the days you don’t feel like going out, but you just want to get something in. So kind of take people through that and then how to organize your workouts. Like, I think, of them in terms of social splits. So one day might be more of like a leg and butt day. one day might be more of a leg and kind of hamstrings day. I’ll do two leg days a week. one day might be like more back and biceps. Another day might be chest and triceps. So aiming for like three or four times a week. And, you know, it doesn’t have to be like an hour. You can think of it in terms of, you know, 30 to 40 minutes getting like three, four sets of, of things done. And then, you know, my coach always says something is better than nothing. So. Yeah, whatever. Whatever way makes the most sense. But just like I even. I’ve heard of people putting things in different corners of their house just so that like when they walk by, they see it and then they, they’ll know to do like a, A few sets of something. So. Whatever, you know. Whatever.

Wendy Valentine: Whatever works. Yeah.

Anne Marie Chaker: For you. Yeah, yeah.

Wendy Valentine: Even, I think I shared with you earlier, but even in the rv, like, I had a few really weights. I had the bands, I don’t even know what they’re called. You know how like you put the band around your, your thighs and you do like, kind of like the moving squats?

Anne Marie Chaker: Yes, yes, I would do that.

Wendy Valentine: I mean, the RV is. I mean, it’s 100 square feet. And my hallway. Hallway, if you will, with the whole thing. I mean, it’s like maybe this wide. It’s not that big, but you can make it work. Right? So I literally would go from, like, I would take the van and I would. I would move from the bathroom over to the cab. Back and forth.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: And then I would even do, like, on the back of the. The kitchen counter, I would do the, like, where I’d. I’d kind of, put my hands back there and then put my feet up on the couch and I would just like. I don’t even know what those are called.

Some women can be intimidated by going into the gym and all the weights

Anne Marie Chaker: Tricep dips.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah. But I mean, where there’s a will, there’s a way. And.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, and I would say too, I.

Wendy Valentine: Don’T be curious what you think as well, but, I mean, some. Some women can be intimidated by going into the gym and all the weights or even doing it at home. There’s a ton of apps out there where they show you how to do things if you need a little bit more instruction. I had a friend, Amy, actually, that she, she hired a trainer just, just so that this trainer would just create a routine for her. Like, she went, just only like maybe three or four times with this trainer, just so she would like, okay, this machine, this is what you’re going to do. And this on these days. And that helped her just to get going and to have that confidence to go into the gym by herself. So you just figure it out. And yeah, I mean, God, YouTube, there’s tons of stuff.

Anne Marie Chaker: There’s tons of stuff on YouTube. you know, even if you join one of the gym, take advantage. Sometimes they’ll give you like a freebie, two, three sessions with a personal trainer. Take it, because first of all, get them, really put them to work, get them to help you set up a routine that you can follow every week. And, it also kind of helps you learn what the different. Some of the pieces of equipment might be foreign to you, helps you learn what’s available. I will say I did a story recently, where I interviewed, like, gym CEO. Some of these, like, women are infiltrating these spaces like never before. it’s great. Like, when I started, I, there were very few women in the gym. This was before COVID 2019 was when I kind of started my, strength training journey. And I was feeling far. Now it’s like 50, 55% of people who are in the weight rooms are women. This is wonderful. And I always make a point to be the weirdo. To, like, reach out to a woman next to me or whatever and be like, hey, good, I am Emery. Isn’t this great? Like, whatever kind of, like, gets you chatty. Like, it’s important for women to kind of get to know each other and take up space in these spaces as well.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, I think, too, like, with weights, you just. There’s only weights can give you that certain type of look. And the cut, like, when you’re wearing a sleeveless dress or, you know, it’s just like. And it’s nice. Like, you look in the mirror, like, you know, and you don’t have to be, like, super buff, but just a little bit. Nice tone. It, like, gives you really nice tone.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yes. Yeah.

Bodybuilders think of food in terms of the big three macronutrients

Wendy Valentine: So last but not least, chapter seven. Eat like a bodybuilder. The value of protein and other. And it got cut off.

Anne Marie Chaker: Oh, and other macronutrients.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, that’s what it was.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. So bodybuilders think of food in terms of, like, the big three macronutrients, which is carbs, proteins, and fats. And, the main name of the game, I would say, is meeting enough protein. so if you’re really devoted to the lifestyle and trying to lift weights, ideally, you should be getting about a gram of protein per pound of body weight. I consume somewhere between 120, 130 grams of, protein a day. which suits me fine. I’m very active, I lift a lot of weights, and I’m very hungry. So. And I’m an unabashed carnivore. So, so, yeah, and then, like, carbs is something that has been vilified. but, you know, carbs are important. It should be about 50% of what you consume. so I talk about, like, what I eat in terms of my favorite carbs. and then fats are. Fats won’t make you fat. Yeah, I consume, about 15 of what I consume is, in healthy fats. So, the name of the game is just kind of staying ahead and, like, prepping your fridge, prepping your meals ahead of time. I really try not to eat out very much. I just, like. It’s nice. But I used to rely a lot on quick takeout, and I’ve, really kind of focused more on eating at home and grocery shopping and meal prepping for the week. And what I mean by that is, the old Tupperwares and I kind of stash. I always have, like, a big salad. at the ready. my carbs is usually, some cooked white rice in a Tupperware. I have some boiled, potatoes or sweet potatoes in another Tupperware. And then I have, cooked up some protein. So it could be like grilled chicken breasts. It could be turkey crumbles. I like to combine, 93 and 99 Turkey with me, a little taco seasoning or whatever. what else I got in there? I mean, liquid egg whites. I do a lot of smoothies. I put liquid egg bites in there. Your eggs. so, you know, from there you can cobble together lots of different, lots of different meals, for yourself, for the kids. you don’t have to. It doesn’t. Eating well doesn’t have to mean recipes and sauces and.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, I know. I’ve kind of gotten away from that myself. I mean, having, you know, with raising three kids and cooking dinners, and now it’s like, oh, keep it. I’m happy with just good old piece of, you know, sauteed chicken and a salad on the side. Yeah, no, not that. I’m just like. And it’s, yeah, too not to have a bunch of additional stuff on there. I use more herbs and spices now than I did before, but keep it very simple. But, yeah, you’re right, it doesn’t. It doesn’t mean that it’s going to take even more time. It’s like if you just, just, just cut that time out of your schedule. Like, okay, I’m gonna go to the. Go to the store, get all these things for the week. And then you’re kind of glad that you did all that. Then it’s like, for the rest of the week, you’re like, ah, I got Tupperwares full of stuff. You know, it makes it so much easier.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah, yeah, no, I think it’s a good way to be. So, yeah, those are my greatest hits.

Wendy Valentine: I’m going to the gym tomorrow. So I’m like, what, are you working tomorrow?

Anne Marie Chaker: So I, Tomorrow is going to be some upper body and, some cardio. I’m cutting for my next competition later this summer, so. Car the card. The old cardio gets kicked up a notch these days. I’ve, I’ve really started. Just to mix things up a bit. I’ve started going to Orange Theory. there’s an Orange Theory a couple blocks from me. And, I think they do a great job. I really like the energy in there. Not I don’t every day, but, yeah, a couple times a week. Just sometimes it’s just nice to tell someone else. Telling you what to do and playing the music and it’s good. I like the. I like the orange.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, I just. I. Same. Well, not an orange theory, but I. I actually belong to two gyms and it’s kind of nice because it changes it up a little bit. Different people, different. Different class.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: And I love. In classes. I love spinning.

Anne Marie Chaker: Do you?

Wendy Valentine: yeah, it’s like meditation for me.

Find something that you enjoy and not everything we’re going to enjoy

I wish it would be appropriate to sit and take notes on a spinning bike because I’m like, I’ll come up with some really good ideas. I’m like, interesting.

Anne Marie Chaker: Like.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, to me it’s. Yeah. Very meditative. I enjoy the cycling. And because of my spine, I can’t. I can’t do. I can’t run anymore.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: And. But that’s. That’s part of it too. You kind of learn your body. What can you learn your body? Just work around it. Like there’s.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yes.

Wendy Valentine: Always something. But yeah, and to enjoy it, like, find something that you enjoy and not everything we’re going to enjoy. There’s. Sometimes I’m like. Like that machine or this or.

Anne Marie Chaker: Right.

Wendy Valentine: Doing it anyway.

Anne Marie Chaker: Right, right, right.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah.

Anne Marie Chaker: Always trying to. There’s something called the perceived rate of exertion. so on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the hardest, it’s good to kind of hit that. Eight, nine. Like, maybe you could eke out one more.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, two more.

Anne Marie Chaker: But really kind of like it’s hard but in a good way, you know? Yeah, I like. I like that feeling.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, exactly. Thank you so much. This is.

Anne Marie Chaker: Hey, Wendy. This was so fun. You’re so.

Wendy Valentine: I hope everyone gets your book because I think it’ll be so helpful.

Ann Marie Chaker will be doing a book tour in an RV

so speaking of, where do we find you? How do we get the book?

Anne Marie Chaker: So my name is Ann Marie Chaker. C H A K E R. I’m on Instagram, Annmarie Chaker. I also have a website, annmarie chaker.com and you can see all the links, where you can get the book. It’s available Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Target, Walmart, anywhere books are sold. So, yes, you can also follow me on Substack. I write a substack newsletter. so it’s sub. Annemariecher.substack.com.

Wendy Valentine: You’Re just everywhere, doing your thing.

Anne Marie Chaker: All over the place.

Wendy Valentine: All over the place. Yeah.

Anne Marie Chaker: Wendy. In an rv.

Wendy Valentine: I know, right? I know. And I’ll be doing my book tour in the rv, so that’s gonna be. Oh, I know that’ll be great.

Anne Marie Chaker: Social.

Wendy Valentine: Oh, maybe I can come see you. I’m going through. I’ll be going, from Miami all the way up to New York and then to Chicago, so I’ll be going. Oh, I’ll swing by.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yes, Yes. I would love to see you in.

Wendy Valentine: D.C. workout in the RV. You can.

Anne Marie Chaker: Oh, fun. Oh, my God. I would love. Seriously. Let’s reach out if you. Yeah. Get up here.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, okay.

Anne Marie Chaker: Okay, fine.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, I’ll end up. We’re still trying to figure out the. The tour cities and dates and stuff, so It’ll be fun.

Anne Marie Chaker: Awesome. Awesome.

Wendy Valentine: yeah, I got. And that’s the thing. I gotta have lots of energy for that, so. I could do it.

Anne Marie Chaker: Yes, you can.

Wendy Valentine: Totally me, woman. Hear me roar.

All right, thank you so much, everyone. Great to meet you. Take care. Get lift

All right, thank you so much, everyone. Have a.

Anne Marie Chaker: Great to meet you. Take care.

Wendy Valentine: Get lift. Get lift.

Anne Marie Chaker: Okay.