Midlife Makeover Show welcomes Wendy Strgar to discuss sexual health

Wendy Valentine: Welcome back to the Midlife Makeover Show. I’m Wendy Valentine and today we are going to double the fun by having not just one Wendy on the show, but two Wendy’s on the show. Yes, I’m thrilled to welcome Wendy Straar. I hope I said your name properly. The incredible entrepreneur and founder of Good Clean Love, the top selling organic brand in the US for personal care products. Not only am I a huge fan and user of their products, but Wendy’s also a true pioneer in the field. Leading advancements in sexual health with safer biomatch products trusted by thousands of doctors. Today we’re diving into a topic that’s essential but often overlooked. Sexual health and well being. Especially as we age. Hello. Wendy will teach us about maintaining a healthy sex drive. Yes, thank you. Understanding the importance of our vaginal health and embracing our bodies at every stage of life, especially through menopause. This is going to be a fun eye opening conversation that celebrates self care, intimacy and health.

Wendy started Good Clean Love after having four children

Let’s welcome Wendy to the show.

Wendy Strgar: Hey Wendy. So nice to be with you today. And that was a lovely, lovely intro. Thank you. Yeah, I’ve been working on women’s health actually since I was started perimenopause, which was right at the time a lot of women. I had my fourth child at 37. And so when you’re, when you’re having your children later, whether it’s the first one or the last one, you know, in your late 30s frequently that brings you right to perimenopause. And so you already have this whole thing happening post postpartum and then that mixes bl, you know, makes its own cocktail in early perimeter menopause, which is just kind of crazy making and you just really don’t know what. You know, many times after you have a child you don’t know what’s happening. Anyway, but to be coming up on this time where your hormones are really shifting or never really shift back to pre pregnancy, you know, it’s, it’s a big change. So, so that, so I started Good Clean Love actually because you can imagine after my fourth kid how I mean literally four live births. and so I had every problem that any woman ever has after having multiple children. And and and, and I really was depending on my sex life with my husband which is the thing that works the best in our marriage to kind of get us through. And it was, it was really hard. It was very, very painful. You know, I had to have a vaginal prolapse surgery not Long after she was bor. Which is where they cut the. This excess tissue. So I had just literally my v** falling out of my v**, you know, out of the labia. And so they cut, like, this much tissue up the back. And talk about pain. Like, that was another level of pain. Yeah, I mean, it made birth. It made giving birth, like, not even seem like pain, actually. Yeah, exactly.

Wendy Valentine: It’s like, oh, like that. That’s easy compared to that.

Wendy Strgar: That wasn’t bad compared to this. Yeah. And so I had a lot of scar tissue for a long time. And that’s what really Dr. To need to find a product that wasn’t made with a glycol like propylene glycol, which is sort of the vast general composition of almost every lubricant in the market. I, mean, it’s changed some since then, but at that time, this was, like, early 2000s. That’s really what you could find in all your legacy brands. Ky Wet, Astro Glide. Right. Like, they were all made. And, you know, just so we’re saying what it is, you know, propylene glycol is another word for brake fluid and antifreeze.

Wendy Valentine: Oh, gosh, that’s horrible.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah, I know. It’s horrible. And what’s really critical to understand, which I didn’t get at the time, you know, I mean, was that, that, you know, when you think about antifreeze, it’s a really good way to segue into understanding vaginal microbiome, because think about the freezing point of antifreeze, right? Like, it’s really high. And so when the freezing point is really high, that determines the salt balance. Or if you want to think about it, about, like, osmosis. So when you’re. When you have something, I talk about it being chemically heavy or, like, really high temperature. Basically what it does is it pulls all of the moisture out of the top layer of cells of your vaginal epithelium. So this is true not just when you’re in menopause or perimenopausal or post menopause.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, it doesn’t matter. Yeah.

Wendy Strgar: Your whole life. Like, you could be 20 years old, and if you’re using those lubricants, you’re basically within four hours, completely disrupting your microbiome by basically drying out and sloughing off the top, most protective immune layer of your vaginal epithelium. And so. So. So it’s like, I thought it was just me, right? Because this is how women think when you, like, use a product and you’re burning. Or like, oh, there’s something wrong with me, right. So I go back to the doctor, go back, they’re like, oh no, you’re fine. And I’m like, okay, I’m not crazy though, you know, and yeah, and so maybe I am a little crazy, but, you know, I knew what was happening to me. And so that’s how I started this huge exploration at good clean love into making the kind of bio match products that really people know us for. At the beginning, it was really about like sexual health products and I was trying to make stuff that didn’t hurt you. So we use like aloe gel and things that were natural things you’d find in a kitchen, honestly. as opposed to say propylene glycol, which you’d never have in the kitchen, you know, but then as unbelievable.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah.

Wendy Strgar: And it’s, it’s kind of incredible that that’s still true today.

Everyone listening should look at the number one or three ingredients in your products

I just want to say everyone listening should look at the number one or three ingredients in your products. And when I say that, I mean, you know, every product used, but especially products use on the most sensitive mucous membranes in your body. Right? Like, because you know, your microbiome, whether you’re talking about your gut microbiome or your oral microbiome or your nasal microbiome, that’s all the same kind of tissue. It’s my m. It’s mucous membrane. And that’s the most sensitive tissue in the body. And so you’re. So when we saw, when we talk about microbiome, you have one microbiome, you don’t have like six separate ones. They’re all connected and they’re all made of this very sensitive tissue that absorbs right. Like way more than just your top skin, your epithelial skin. And and, and you know, it’s bacteria, right? It’s good bacteria and bad bacteria. That’s what that epithelium is, you know, is holding. That’s what that, that microbiome’s job is, is balancing good and bad bacteria. So you know, we know a lot about the gut, but we haven’t, you know, we’ve spent 25 years really studying to have a balanced gut microbiome. Even doctors, right, will say if they give you an antibiotic, they’ll tell you take a probiotic also. Right. but we don’t do that in women’s health. We don’t.

Wendy Valentine: Isn’t that, that’s like, that’s crazy to me.

Wendy Strgar: It is.

Wendy Valentine: And here like we’re at least now that we are taught to read labels of when we go to the grocery store. But that’s the one label we wouldn’t think that we would need to even read to inspect to find out. Like, surely they wouldn’t put chemicals in there, but obviously they do.

Wendy Strgar: I mean, yeah, if you think you’re.

Wendy Valentine: Doing good for yourself.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah. 90. And so that’s why the lubricant market, just as one example, is so little shopped. Right. Only 12% of women go to that category, usually because they’ve had a really bad experience with one of these legacy brands. and you know, and so you know how it is. You buy something and you use it, you have a terrible experience, you throw it away and you don’t go back for an alternative. You just like, I’m not using. Yes.

Wendy Valentine: You’re like, exactly. Yes, exactly.

Wendy Strgar: The category actually has the lowest, return rate, of almost any category because it’s made of ingredients largely, like I was telling you, that should be used for car engines and not for our most sensitive body parts. but like our product at Good Clean Love, we have, like five different lubricants now. And, you know, we have a return rate of like 35%, you know, and because people have a really good experience. And so, you know, if you’re using a lubricant, that really helps to extend, the time that you can sustain some friction and moisturizes you and balances your microbiome at the same time, which is what our products do. you know, then it’s always better to have a good lubricant than not have one. But if your own choice is no lubricant and a bad lubricant, you know, I go with no lubricant all the time. Right. It’s kind of like with gut Biome, if you, if you’re conscious of what it is that keeps your gut healthy, you know, it’s often better to be hungry than to eat food that’s going to make you sick, you know?

Wendy Valentine: Yes.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: What is, what is BioMatch? What is BioMatch?

Wendy Strgar: BioMatch is a method, which is patented, that we came up with, that we apply to all of our product development. and so at the base it’s that it’s isoasmatic. That’s what I was explaining to you about the osmosis thing when we first started. Right. That like, when something is isosmatic, that means it doesn’t disrupt what’s already there. It doesn’t pull moisture out of the cells and it doesn’t add moisture into the cel. Truthfully, hypo osmolar means that you’re putting moisture in the cells, right? Like it’s that the, that the product is so light that it gets absorbed in. But it’s almost impossible to design products that way, you know, so we’re always aiming for ISO osmatic, which means that we’re not disrupting, we’re leaving things as they are. And what’s really important about that is that it’s not easy to do. Right. There’s not that many ingredients you can combine that, that are ISO asthmatic because it’s a pretty low number. And you know, Good Clean Love was the one that was responsible for making some big changes at the FDA about that. They changed their regulations and direction to. And they reduced, hyper osmolar to 1500, which is better than 30,000, like KY warming. so like, any new products coming in have to be below 1500. But even 1500 is hyperosmolar. So hyper osmolar is a scale of 600 to 330,000. But it’s not like you can just be a little hyper osmolar. You’re either hyper osmolar and you’re pulling the moisture out of the tissues or you’re isoasmatic. In my mind, yes. And so you can see that on a histology chart, right? Like, and I can send it to you if you want to put it up, that shows that over four hours you see what normal healthy tissue looks like and then you see what, how it degrades over this short period of time. And even a lot of women have that experience when they go get a pap smear, right? Because Sergio lube, which is what’s frequently used, does the very same thing. It’s like incredibly harsh chemicals, working on creating a healthy alternative for Pap smears that can be read in a Pap test, but, that actually supports your microbiome and doesn’t do that to your microbiome. So, you know, it’s a really big problem. But that, but the biomatch starts with isoasmatic.

Ph balance is the biggest lever you can pull for your vaginal health

And then the second layer of it is that we, we ph balance because the biggest lever you can pull for your vaginal health, and this is for all the women out there, whether they’re peri or post menopausal. M. We really don’t do any studies at all on women who are menopausal, so we don’t know very much, but. We don’t Call bacterial vaginosis the same thing after you’re menopausal. But women will know it by this strange odor, right? So if you have this off sour odor, right, that means that you have an overgrowth of bad bacteria. And what’s really important to know about that is that bad bacteria need high PH to thrive, right? That’s where they live. They live in high PH environments. So if you can control for only one thing and that’s your PH level and you can consistently be bringing your ph down to 3.7, that’s where healthy bacteria thrive, right? So that’s interesting. Bring you to where you can just have that sweet smelling vaginal odor. You don’t have to be concerned about that anymore. And you’re also way more immune protected, right? Because you’ve got good healthy lactobacilli there protecting you from any kind of errant bad bacteria, which is what you want. And so the third thing we do in the biomatch trio set is that we add a type of lactic acid which feeds all kinds of lactobacilli. And why that’s important is because we don’t know why this is true. We only know that it’s true that women of color, and also a lot of white women too, but not strictly white women, tend to have a type of lactobacilli, which is more protective, which is to say that it can it can process both D and L isomers, which is what you need good healthy lactobacilli to thrive. Whereas women of color, and again we don’t know why this is true, but we see in the really terrible like infection rates which are three, six times higher than white women, as well as HPV rates. And most troubling is of course the infant mortality and the complications that black women have in pregnancy. and this is all microbiome directed. And it’s because they’re the type of lactobacilli they have, they don’t digest if you will, and support, they don’t support D isomers which you really need to keep that whole system working that I was just explaining to you. So our products add this type of lactic acid that support both types and so women do better with that whole combination of biomass match support if you will.

Wendy Valentine: So with the biomatch, is that the, the lubricant, do you also have wash too?

Wendy Strgar: Yeah, so we, so we extended like past lubricants and we have some vaginal gels and we have washes which are more like Rinses, honestly, they’re aloe based rinses, really gentle. And they also do the same thing, right? They, they, they’re isoasmatic, they bring your ph down on the outside, the ph is 4 and inside it’s 3.7. And then they provide this healthy lactic acid. So if there’s like, you know, there’s bacteria everywhere, all over us, right? So if you get good bacteria near you, then that bacteria can thrive. But we also have a probiotic which is like all the healthiest bacteria we know that’s native to that area. And we put a homeopathic in it just to support, you know, and also to be able to make claims. and, and so that’s for a lot of the women who just never have the right bacteria because, out of, out of all the women, only one third have a good bacterial makeup and they keep coming back to it over and over again. We know this is true, but we don’t know why it’s true. Well, there’s another third that never have the right bacteria. And again, you know, we don’t know why that’s true. It’s true globally, it’s not just true in our country. And then there’s this middle third that’s constantly trying to get back to healthy, right? But we don’t do a lot of education about this. And some women, you know, they’re constantly having issues, right? Like they don’t even know what it’s like to feel well, but those are the women that we hear from a lot, who like will say, you know, your product saved my life. That’s what’s like over Reddit, you know, because many times they go over and over this doctor, this doctor, this doctor. And you know, generally physicians and healthcare providers are not looking at the microbiome when we diagnose. And so just as a fun fact, which is really disturbing, two out of three infections are misdiagnosed every day. And it’s because we don’t bring data to women’s health. We give out antibiotics in women’s health, as the top line, the first prescription. And that is exceptional in all medical specialties, right? Like, we know that antibiotic resistance is really troubling and yet we continue to use the same antibiotics as if we’re confident that the bacteria that is affecting the woman is always the same bacteria. And we know for a fact that’s not true. So the other thing we did is we developed a, new PCR broad spectrum panel. And what we’re hoping to prove in this new study we’re doing at Vaginal Biome Science is that we’re going to basically take the swabs of 1500 women, between 1500 and 2000 women across 12 conditions. So everything a woman is commonly diagnosed for. And so we’re going to have microbiome data with the diagnosis, the doctors are going to diagnose, and we’re going to see what the doctor says and what the microbiome says. For the first time ever in the world, that data.

Wendy Valentine: Wow.

Wendy Strgar: So I think we’re going to learn a ton about how different bacteria work together, because I think that’s what’s really, important and misunderstood about the microbiome in general. Right. Like, it’s not just a single bacteria. Bacteria that make something true. Right. It’s a community state of bacteria. And, and it’s complicated. Right. But the gut bacteria is like the gut biome is the m. Most complicated. Right. There’s so many different kinds of bacteria, but the vaginal microbiome is where we would expect to see fewer types of bacteria. Right? There’s. It’s not like a community of a hundred or a 500. It’s a community of 10 to 40. Right. And so, so, so it’s a little bit easier to start to understand. And, but what we’re seeing, just as an example, and I talk to a lot of doctors a lot of times in all this work we do, is that there’s a lot of gut bacteria that is showing up in the vaginal microbiome, like enterococcus and strep. You know, those need a different kind of antibiotic, for one thing. they’re not going to respond to the types of antibiotics that doctors are giving or even in many cases, extending treatment for entire pregnancy on an antibiotic. which is like literally insanity for the child and the mother. yeah. And so, there’s a lot of things in women’s health that really need modernization.

Wendy Valentine: So it’s interesting, though, that this all started just from needing something. Yeah. From just needing for the pleasure piece of it. But now it’s actually, it’s so much more than that, which is amazing.

Wendy Strgar: I know it’s been a really interesting and exciting and exhausting life journey. Right. I mean, when I.

Wendy Valentine: You’re saving. You’re saving so many vaginas, though.

Wendy Strgar: When I first discovered about propylene glycol, you know, I mean, this was at the early stages, I was like, oh, my God, can I tell anybody this? Right? Like, like as though I’m like, first, I couldn’t actually believe it, right? Like, they can’t be using brake fluid in lubricant, right. Like, I’m like, no, you know, it.

Wendy Valentine: Had to have been a man that came up with that, right?

Wendy Strgar: Of course. Right.

One of the top rules about sexual sex is hygiene, right?

Like, and it’s cheap, right? It’s incredibly cheap ingredient. And so it’s just like, when we don’t think about women, we don’t. We don’t think about women and what they need for their health. And, you know, and I’m just like, I told you I just had my birthday. I’m like, over it now. And, you know, I just feel like this is something I was given to do and I’m just going to try to see it to the end.

Wendy Valentine: Well, and I would think too, if, if these products, and which I know that they are. They’re so good for us as women. But then obviously during sex, it’s also good for the man.

Wendy Strgar: Totally.

Wendy Valentine: The other woman.

Wendy Strgar: Of course, you know, a lot of bacterial vaginosis infections that reoccur is because the man has it in his foreskin, right? And so I would say one of the top rules about sexual sex is hygiene, right? Like, you should always wash before you have sex. Both partners should wash before you have sex. Because it’s sexy, right? Like who? You know, I mean, I, mean, it’s clean, you know, and, and, and so, So, yeah, like, like if somebody’s not willing to wash for you, then you should really think about. And you know, it’s the same thing. Like, you know, this was some data points that I just have been learning about on my, on my social media efforts. You know, it’s like, like an insane percentage of women, like, have sex with men that don’t care about their pleasure. Right. like, like we think that we’ve sort of come to a new place, but. And I think even among older women, right, like this kind of faking o, like 80% of the time, sometimes women fake o because. Because it gets them in the mood. Mood, Right. Like, it, it pumps them up. Right. So love that, you know, and if that’s the pathway all about it, you know, sometimes, because they don’t want to hurt somebody’s feelings, right. They want them to believe it was good.

Wendy Valentine: I mean, if that’s not something that women do though, right, like, just to please, like, let me just pretend I’m having o*, that I’m having pleasure, but really not just so that you’re happy.

Wendy Strgar: I mean, so. But that’s still an, Altruistic reason to do it.

Wendy Valentine: Yep.

Wendy Strgar: You know that they wanna, that. But you know, many times it’s because they just want to get it over with. Right. And, and, and, and what’s wrapped up in all that data is that you know that we know that a woman takes maybe twice as much time as a man to o*, especially in partnered sex. So whereas a man could do it in five to seven minutes, a woman, it’s more like 12 to 17 minutes. Right. Still not much time. It’s not that much time. Honestly, if you don’t have that much time to like, actually really pleasure each other, then I don’t know what you’re so busy doing. Right. Like what?

Wendy Valentine: You know.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah. And

Wendy Valentine: And you know, one thing, one thing I want to point out. I know that, it was on your Instagram and you did a video about skipping the spit and about, like not. Yes. And about how you think about that.

Wendy Strgar: So many germs in your mouth.

Wendy Valentine: Yes.

Wendy Strgar: So. And so, so yeah, we can talk about oral sex separately. But you know, if you’re just. If you’re not going to use a lubricant, use clean water. Don’t, you know. And you know, I mean, again, if you’re clean and you use hygiene, then you know, I’m all about oral sex. I love oral sex, you know. Yeah. But I don’t love oral sex on a d*** that hasn’t been washed. Right. You know, so, so anyway, And you know, a lot of women will get HPV cancer in their throat from not, you know, I mean. Yeah, so. So hygiene’s really important. and

About the importance of having orgasms and how important that is

so let’s talk about what, what.

Wendy Valentine: About the health of having o and how important that is. Like in especially. I mean, even as we age, the importance of that sexual health, I think.

Wendy Strgar: It becomes even more important. And what I would say is that, that like, for many women, statistically, it’s after they give birth, after they have children, if they’re especially like I said, if they’re in this older space, that many women never feel comfortable with their body again. And comfortable like in sexual pleasure, which is just so tragic to me. And, and it’s, it’s, it’s much bigger than that. I think many women don’t even really understand the mechanism of o, just as many women will think they o that didn’t as women orgasmed who didn’t think they did. Right. So. And a lot of women will talk about internal or external or G spot or clitoral o*. Right. As if it’s a mystery. But the truth is that we just don’t teach women.

Wendy Valentine: I know.

Wendy Strgar: and give women permission even when they’re young, even now in 2024. It’s not that different, right. That they can prioritize their pleasure. So. So I just would say a few things about that. One is masturbation, right? Like, it’s a f. It’s the most foundational sexual act. And yet many less. Way fewer women m* than men, even now at every age range, right? And here’s the really surprising thing, is that many women will not m* till they climax. And so, you know, so, you know, get a good bottle of lube that’s actually balancing your microbiome, like good clean love and. Or some slippery oil, and really learn to feel yourself and know what your own sexual response is. Because that’s how you. Because, you know, there’s this really strange mythology that’s been going on forever, since before we were little girls even that just know about it or that it’s a, It’s somebody that gives that to you, right? Like, it’s a man that gives that to you. And I just want to say nobody gives you an o. That is a gift that comes from inside of you. If anybody, it’s the goddess that does. And, you know, and that’s something that you offer as like an energetic boon to whoever you’re with, right? But mostly it’s an incredible, like, reset for yourself, right? Like, it’s like, you know, it’s like a spiritual, mental, emotional, physiological reset that is yours alone to discover, you know. And, And I tell all young women, all young women, that it’s like no one has business penetrating you until you’ve had a clitoral o. The clitoral o. And understand that the c* is not just spot at the top of your v. But we learned, actually, when I was 40 years old, this came out. This was the first time we understood that the c is an organ system. And it has legs that go up the sides of the vaginal walls and meet at the back of the v* where the G spot is, which is not some mythical thing. It’s a real spot that’s real spongy. And you can feel it even sometimes on the exterior, you know, of like, imagine where that. Where those legs come up. Actually, it was like, mindblowing to me when I learned that, because I. I would have these clitoral o* and then feel this intense pressure on the inside. Be like what is going on with me? And then I come to find out, of course, that that’s where the clitoral legs end. And then if you find the right position for penetration and you can get to that spot, it’s literally an entire explosion. But you can’t do that without turning the key of the extern o first because that, like, engorges all of those legs and all of that tissue with blood. Right. And that is like the. That’s like the arousal mechanism of the vaginal physiology that allows you to have that second o** inside.

Wendy Valentine: I love what you said earlier about how much it does affect you. Not just physically. We always. We always think of that of, like, all right, the sexual piece of it is just connected to the physical aspect of you. But no, it’s mentally, emotionally, spiritually. It’s everything. It’s like this beautiful union that happens within you.

Wendy Strgar: The Holy Grail, right?

Wendy Valentine: Yeah.

Wendy Strgar: That’s why everybody wants to o*. and that’s why pornography takes up more than 50% of the Internet. But it also speaks to, like, you know, how. How. How rarely people are able to have that experience that they really. They own and, And that they can explore and discover without shame.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, exactly. And I think. I do think it helps to be more knowledgeable about it. I mean, just having you on here, and I told you before we hit record, I’m like, I’ve had people on the show before. We talk about perimenopause and menopause, and it’s all great, but talking about your actual human body, your. Your female body, your v*, all of that, like, really learning about your body.

Wendy Strgar: 57% of women can’t name their body parts. They’re. They’re vaginal, clitoral, labial body parts. I mean, so it’s like, you know, we are doing such an incredible disservice to. And girls. Right. And. And, you know, and.

I think Europe is a little bit more advanced at becoming comfortable with sexuality

But can I just say this feels really important to me. And I feel like we overlook this in many ways, that, you know, we think about where we are in our country, or even in Western culture. Let’s just call it Western culture.

Wendy Valentine: Right.

Wendy Strgar: and in many ways, I think Europe’s a little bit more advanced at becoming comfortable with sexuality than the United States is. Right? We, you know, we sent. We sent all the puritans away from England, and they’re, like, well entrenched in the U.S. you know, the Puritans and the criminals were the ones sent to the Americas. So is. Are we surprised about where we are right now. Not really. you know, and so I’ll probably get barred for saying that on some social platform. But anyway, it doesn’t matter. It’s the truth. but like if you think about the state of the female, of women globally and you think about the ways in which women are sold as children by their parents and you think about the ways in which women can be burned and no one even at their wedding, Right. And no one even goes to look. Right. Like you think of the, the millions of young girls that have their c* is cut off by other women. I just want to say like this is happening today. This isn’t just happening, happening a hundred years ago. It’s like, like the way we, the way we have lost our reverence.

Wendy Strgar: For what is female on this planet affects everyone on this planet. And And until that gets righted in any way, like, you know, we’re destroying the globe which is Mother Earth. Right. Like the way we treat women is the way we treat this planet. I really believe that. And so when I think about the work I do and trying to raise women up to like actually really understand and, and, and not feel this shame about their body and, and want to know that part of their business, it feels like global work, honestly. It is.

Wendy Valentine: Yes.

Wendy Strgar: And it is like it’s fundamentally an education problem. Right. Like, because you know, like even in Africa, you know, in Ghana, they passed a law that says we going to cut girls anymore. They passed a law. Hm. In 2017, I think. And still the old women who get this work of cutting passed down to them mother after mother after mother, they still like will say no, this girl will be unclean, she’ll be unmarriageable, she’ll be untrustworthy. If she can feel pleasure, that is the foundation. So like, I don’t know if change anyone’s mind in the world anymore, truthfully. It seems like maybe, I don’t know if you ever could. That was what we always presumed that that’s why we believed in education. Right. We believed that if you give people tools to think critically that they could come to different conclusions. Certainly we’ve seen that failing dramatically in the United States and that, that, that we don’t do that education globally the way we need to. but, but I, but the reason I talk about that global story with you now, Wendy, is because, because, because the ways in which we can’t give ourselves permission here is we live in one world. Right. And, and even though we say that, I don’t know those girls that that’s happening to. It’s like, I do really believe there’s one energy that holds us all and. And it impacts us. It just does.

Wendy Valentine: It does. I mean, it’s just like. It’s the butterfly effect, right? Whether it’s doing good or bad, it. It affects all of us from all over the globe and for decades and sometimes un. These centuries to come, I mean, just like you said, for. I mean, it’s. It’s crazy to think, like, the belief system about women and about our bodies and about our sexuality that we start to think for ourselves of what and we can change. Make these changes in. In ourselves and in the world, right?

Wendy Strgar: Oh, totally. and. And it starts with you as an individual, right? Like something, something. Something as simple and mundane as. As. As learning to touch yourself and bring yourself to climax. You know, I always say that if I could change one thing in the world, and it was people’s ability to, like, actually be intimate and enjoy pleasure together, it would change everything else. So much of the violence in the world is connected to people’s frustration, honestly, you know?

Wendy Valentine: Yes, I know. I know. And what.

Wendy Strgar: It. What is sexual? And it becomes violent, Honestly. What.

Did your mom educate you on your sexual health or vaginal health

Wendy Valentine: So now I’m curious.

Wendy Strgar: Did.

Wendy Valentine: Did your, Did your mom educate you on your. No. Yeah. On your sexual health or vaginal health? No.

Wendy Strgar: No. I’m kind of a renegade, I think. You know, I. I’m a very active learner. Right. And. And so, when I. When I have problems, like I told you, I had really significant sexual issues, but I was always very sexual as even a. I, remember, like, feeling guilty and wondering, like, what is going on with me? Why do I always touch myself as a small child? Right. Like, but whatever I am with Scorpio. And so I’m pretty sexual. And,

Wendy Valentine: And your name is Wendy, so. Hello.

Wendy Strgar: So there’s that too. Exactly. and so, So I really was very committed to not giving up my sex life after my children. Children. Yeah. Because it was really always this very important release for me, even in ways that I couldn’t understand it when I was young. And I also happen to fall into that group that doesn’t have the right microbiome usually. Right. Like, and so. So even as a kid, I would get yeast infections one after the next, and I’d have to go to the doctor, Right. Because you couldn’t get at drugstores. And, And then I’d feel guilty again, right?

Wendy Valentine: Like, oh, something like, there’s something wrong. I know. I had. I had Those a lot. Like especially in my, probably my 20s. And then, you know, UTIs and yeah, like it’s like, oh my God, there’s something wrong with.

Wendy Strgar: And Planned Parenthood was the first one that ever made a brochure about how to like protect against yeast infections. And I’m like, d***, why didn’t anybody tell me this?

Wendy Valentine: Do you remember? Do you remember, like they would tell you, don’t wear tight fitting jeans. Like that was one of the things that they would tell you. And I’m thinking, thinking, surely it’s got more to do with just genes.

Wendy Strgar: Like why. I mean there’s a lot of simple stupid things that screw up your microbiome, right? Like, sex. Sex for sure does, right? Especially unprotected sex. So I always say to people, is this guy worth screwing up your microbiome right now? You know, and, you know, and if it’s a lot of new partners, you just don’t know what kind of germs you’re going to be introducing, producing. Honestly.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, if you’re out there, if you’re out there dating, you just be like, listen, don’t you dare mess up my microbiome.

Wendy Strgar: but actually. Or use a combo, right? Like, you know, if you know him well enough. and also, I hate the idea of those dams, but if you really don’t know him well enough, then you don’t want his tongue there either. You know what I mean? So, yeah, so, so, so for sure that, but you know, if you wear a wet bathing suit for a long time, that can do it. if you’re, if you know, if you’re wearing tight yoga pants that you just wear all day long, literally, that can just know bacteria. Yeah. You know, I mean, it’s like, it’s a, it’s a sensitive system. Right. Like you don’t have to eat like that many bad things or like, you know, it just one night of drinking can screw up your microbiome of your gut. You know, it’s, it’s you know, and it’s like dynamic, right? So you’re, you’re kind of constantly wanting to take care of yourself. And so we have this, this system that we’re going to be launching on Good Clean love called Changing Phases. And it has the wash and the, so the wash that you use every day, you stop using any other, any other wash, Vagisil or Summer’s Eve, especially any of that stuff, anything that covers odor is actually making you sicker. So just know that. And and then, so and then use the gel every night, especially midlife. And then, and then that keeps you moist for when you want to have sex also. And and then you use this suppository a couple times a week. And I pretty much would guarantee that anybody who does that stuff, on a. Like just the same way you take care of your hair, your face.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, yeah. Brush your teeth.

Wendy Strgar: Yep. They will feel better every day.

Wendy Valentine: That is so genius that you did that.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah, I, I like do it every day. Every day. And also if you’re going to use the lubricant, don’t use a s* hyper osmolar lubricant. Use a ISO lubricant that supports your microbiome. And a lot of people are sort of onto us now and so they say that they are, but everybody always steals claims without any idea of what they’re. So make sure you actually know. Like you could email a company and say, what’s the osmolality of your lubricant? And if they say I have no idea, then you know they’re lying.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Now I found good clean love at Target. At Target.

Wendy Free is a practicing Hindu goddess worshipper

and it was the lubricant that I found. I think I might have seen the wash there as well. But so do you. I mean everything’s on your website though, right?

Wendy Strgar: Yeah, we have a website and you can get everything there, of course. but but most of the stores in store we have mostly have lubricants on shelf.

Wendy Valentine: Okay. Right.

Wendy Strgar: We’re trying to get this, we’re trying to get this changing phases line into store now. So we’ll see how well that works. But but, but like Amazon, you can also get everything delivered pretty quick.

Wendy Valentine: Oh, so you’re, you are on Amazon, People buy the.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah, like that’s our biggest customer, honestly.

Wendy Valentine: So you know what? I’ll do too because I have my own Amazon store. So I will, as soon as we get done here, I will add your products to my Amazon store because some people will just go there. However, however. Which way? Just get the product because you want to do good for your v*, for your body, your whole life.

Wendy Strgar: I’ll email you the product set to recommend. Okay. and and then you can just put it up there. Yeah, you know, that’s what we hear about like in our review use, which is the thing that keeps me going in all this work. It’s really like pushing a really big boulder up a really steep hill and then kind of falling back and pushing it again, you know. But, but m. But women will say over and over, over again that I, you. I discovered this and I’m finally better. Thank you. Please don’t ever stop doing what you’re doing. And so, you know, whatever. That’s the whole goal. Right? Because I mean, literally you’re healing the planet with everything, you know.

Wendy Valentine: Yes. Saving. Saving. Saving the world one v* at a time.

Wendy Strgar: Trying to. Right. Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: Thank you, Wendy. You’re awesome.

Wendy Strgar: Thank you. Actually. I knew you would be. Sometimes, sometime, if you want, we could like dive really more deeply into like some sex education. I wrote this book called Sex that Works. Also available on ah, Kindle, Amazon. and, and, and it’s really, it’s. It’s not a sex book. Like here, use this technique or this technique. It’s a way to think about your erotic soul. Yes. In a way with compassion and curiosity and wonder and bringing fantasy into it and allowing yourself your own fantasies, which is a really big step for a lot of women. and, and so we could do another show sometime about like that stuff.

Wendy Valentine: Oh, I love it.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah.

Wendy Valentine: One of the, one of the greatest things I did for myself after my divorce, I actually hired a goddess coach. She was called a goddess coach. But I learned so much more about my feminine energy. Getting more connected with myself. It was the greatest gift I gave to myself. And it literally, it truly does change your whole life.

Wendy Strgar: Your, your myself. you know, I’m a practicing Hindu goddess worshipper. and so when I’m awake in the night, I just chant, right? I just chant to a goddess. and, and when, when I o*, I chant to a goddess. Honestly. because really it’s hers. It belongs to her. If it belongs to anybody, it belongs to her. but yeah, I, you know, we are really of the God goddess. You know, it’s, it’s, it’s it’s something that’s been lost. Although, you know, in India that’s widely practiced. and you know, the, and the union of the male energy Shiva, and the female energy Shakti, is what makes the universe. So that’s why it’s really easy for me to be a believer in that religion because I do think that is how we are reborn all the time. Time.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah. I love it. You’re so awesome. So glad we connected.

Wendy Strgar: I will right back at you. And like I said, now I’m thinking I’m going to come see you in Madera sometime there.

Wendy Valentine: Yeah, I know you have to. Actually, I’m going to start teaching retreats here. So that would be good. You. You can educate the vaginas.

Wendy Strgar: And listen, sign me up. I, I’ll be the vaginal sexual health teacher.

Wendy Valentine: Free lubricant for everyone. One.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah. I’ll bring a.

The cost of vaginal issues is like $60 billion a year

A, gift bag. And,

Wendy Valentine: Oh, and before I forget, so website is goodclean love.com, right?

Wendy Strgar: And the vaginal. And the around the vaginal health is called vaginal biome Science dot com.

Wendy Valentine: Okay. Yeah. And there’s. So your website’s really good. There’s. There’s a blog on there and even on your Instagram, like I mentioned before. Yeah. So follow them on Instagram. Really good stuff. I’m following them. but yeah, education and just getting more familiar with all of it.

Wendy Strgar: And.

Wendy Valentine: And yeah. Become an expert in your own body.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah. Ah, totally. And don’t be afraid or ashamed of, like, what the. Of the gift of pleasure. Right. Like, it’s, it’s a miracle. It’s a miracle that we have that. And so to live the whole life and. And not have that is like, for me, that. That just feels like tragedy. You know, women used to say to me when I was just working on sexual health, why are you, like, on his side? Why do you keep pushing me to have sex? I’m like, I’m not on his side. I’m on your side.

Wendy Valentine: Your side. Exactly.

Wendy Strgar: It’s, like, really good for you to have pleasure, you know, Your whole world will change, you know, so. And. But then it’s like, I. I don’t. There’s so much there that prevents us from touching that in ourselves. And. And a lot of it that I realized was that women don’t feel good in their v* every day. Right? It’s not like. It’s not like just. They have pain with sex every day. They don’t feel good, right? They stop exercising. They, like, won’t ride a bike. They, you know, they, The cost of vaginal issues is like $60 billion a year. Right? Like, people don’t go to work when they have these things, you know, so some of them are really, really painful and meaningful. They can’t wipe when they pee. You know, so it’s like, I’m, not, you know, so we have to help women feel good, healthy in their vaginas. And then hopefully that just feeling good, smelling themselves feeling good will make them think, oh, gosh, maybe I would want to try sex again. Like, that’s how it will go, I think.

Wendy Valentine: Oh, Thank you, Wendy.

Wendy Strgar: Yeah. Yes.

Wendy Valentine: That’s how it’s gonna go.

Wendy Strgar: Thank you, Wendy, for having me. And I’ll send you an email with some more info. And let’s for sure stay in touch.

Wendy Valentine: I know, I know. All right, everyone, go, go. Have good, clean love.

Wendy Strgar: There you go.